If you have been playing World of Warcraft for more than a few months, you have heard the jokes about partner-aggro). You have probably also heard the “must not have a life” argument. You may have even made the comments yourself! It has been weighing on my mind lately, so that is what I am writing about today.
It is not a secret that Kurby and I met in game. I joined his guild as a server transfer to play with a friend that was already in his guild, and wound up becoming one of the main healers for the guild at the beginning of Wrath of the Lich King. It may surprise you that Kurby and I were not involved with each other outside of raid discussions/healing strategies for a long time, because we actually were not looking to meet someone in game. We were friends for nearly a year before we started dating! Since we met in game, we are lucky that we both play and do not really have any issues over the amount of time that being a raider can take.
A few weeks ago, a conversation on twitter with discussing how some of us do not have many female friends outside of the game, though we do in game. It got me to thinking about my female friends that I do have outside of the game…most of them are not gamers. In fact, most of them, HATE that their spouses play video games, and make it a point to talk bad about that fact. One even calls her spouse some childish names because he loves to play games. Yet, most of them are not willing to try to play the games with their spouses. They expect their partner to share an interest with them, but have no desire to share the gaming interest with their partner. I do know of some people in game who would LOVE their partners to play the game with them, but they are reluctant to try it.
I do not understand this…I have no interest in playing the guitar, but I sure listen to Kurby play it! I love watching Grey’s Anatomy and Parenthood, both of which Kurby could probably do without, but he watches them with me. Do not get me wrong, there are plenty of things we do alone as well. I love playing the Sims (3)..I have spent hours playing it! Kurby likes to play games that I am horrible at playing! I love to read, he loves to snowboard. When he and the kids go snowboarding, I read a good book! However, the point I am making is, how can someone complain about their partner being a gamer, if they are not willing to at least TRY to share the interest?
It is worth noting that while gaming together can be fun in an MMO setting, you do not have to be doing the same thing together all the time to have fun doing it. I love raiding with Kurby. I hate questing with him. We have our own ways of questing and it leads to much bickering. This is especially true at expansion time! To be fair to the non-gaming partner, gaming CAN take up a lot of time, and if your partner is not a gamer, you should really try to work out an agreeable amount of time you are going to spend gaming to where everyone can be happy.